I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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