she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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