ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
