Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
Just dont open the beer drawer.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.