Your tits are I can't wait for
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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