it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize