Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You ate ashes out of my bong
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
