we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Randomize