i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
