using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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