You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
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It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
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Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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