his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
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Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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