I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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