direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
