Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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