Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
