if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
