I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
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