soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize