There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Why is your signature on my underwear?
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
