Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
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