"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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