I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.