Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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