I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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