I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
