Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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