the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
