R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
