No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You need Xanax blowdarts
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
