I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I feel like a drive thru vagina
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize