can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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