are you still at the devil's house?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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