You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
