Texts From Last Night

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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??

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  (573): Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B?? http://tfl.nu/t2no
  Replies (21) Good night (3605) Bad night (931)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.

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  (904): How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face. http://tfl.nu/e61v
  Replies (17) Good night (651) Bad night (3052)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  how do you have sooo much energy?

  (571): View more from Virginia

  billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week

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  (703): how do you have sooo much energy? (571): billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week http://tfl.nu/czgq
  Replies (16) Good night (4516) Bad night (769)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.

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  (504): As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them. http://tfl.nu/apo9
  Replies (3) Good night (602) Bad night (3915)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.

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  (727): You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that. http://tfl.nu/4x8y
  Replies (15) Good night (4178) Bad night (851)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I find this completely acceptable.

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  (903): Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework? (321): I find this completely acceptable. http://tfl.nu/32xm
  Replies (27) Good night (5606) Bad night (930)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...

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  (937): pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point... http://tfl.nu/zj6y
  Replies (17) Good night (8646) Bad night (1256)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.

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  (727): His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there. http://tfl.nu/9vdb
  Replies (6) Good night (1300) Bad night (2290)
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  (805): View more from California

  you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible

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  (805): you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible http://tfl.nu/6jjf
  Replies (11) Good night (1057) Bad night (4803)
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  (310): View more from California

  Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.

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  (310): Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine. http://tfl.nu/yujo
  Replies (5) Good night (821) Bad night (1382)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?

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  (908): Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka? http://tfl.nu/zznq
  Replies (2) Good night (1134) Bad night (427)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving

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  (641): and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving http://tfl.nu/ilw7
  Replies (1) Good night (748) Bad night (525)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia

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  (248): I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia http://tfl.nu/wvuh
  Replies (3) Good night (313) Bad night (853)
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  (760): View more from California

  And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day

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  (760): And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day http://tfl.nu/vzu2
  Replies (1) Good night (671) Bad night (349)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call

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  (301): Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call http://tfl.nu/0acs
  Replies (2) Good night (402) Bad night (214)

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