Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
