i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Randomize
