Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize