Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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