I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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