someone threw a dead crab at me
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Randomize
