It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
why do cheetos always look like penises
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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