after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize