I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
