is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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