dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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