I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
This show inspires me to have sex in space
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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