Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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