John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
areolas are like halos for boobs.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
