You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
